Speakers quote

Last week, I had a Strategy Session with an accomplished author, consultant and speaker in Europe.

His goal over the coming year is to increase the amount of paid speaking engagements he gets because being on stage naturally leads him to more consulting gigs as well.

First, we looked at what he is currently doing.

Almost every time he is getting booked for speaking, it’s because the event organizer found him by doing research or through a referral.

So every time he gets booked, it’s because the decision maker needs him right now. That’s good of course.

However, the challenge is that there is no control he has over that. The decision maker does the research, comes up with several people to call and then compares his choices.

So we started working on a different approach

We looked at his existing network.

When I asked him how many event organizers and creators he has in his network, he said that he had neglected connecting with them in the past. He had mainly focused on connecting with peers. So we started there.

Now, as you know, a referral is one of the most powerful ways to win new business.

So we mapped out a referral trust building sequence.

Because he had no systematic approach in the past, he neglected keeping up the relationships with his peers and did not nurture them.

So we started with brainstorming what a re-connection sequence could look like.

A re-connection sequence is designed to re-establish a relationship or re-initiate it. This can be done with anyone from a good friend you haven't’ talked to in a long time, to a LinkedIn connection you never really talked to.

The speaker told me that he had recently developed some simple tools to make his life as a speaker a lot easier. So he could share these tools with his peers because that would add tremendous value to their lives.

Great. Now we even had some content to start with.

At the end of our conversation, we got to a place where we had a very clear idea about what kinds of trust building stages his peers need to go through in order to remember him as the very first person when somebody asks about great speakers on his topic.

We even mapped out some of the content he could share with his peers to make that happen.

As the next step in our relationship, we need to identify the right people in his network, categorize them and then design the actual messages in the trust building sequence that will evolve his peers from one stage to the next. This will ensure that the network he has already built, is actually working for him and he’s not just wasting this asset.

Now I want you to think about your network

Where are your relationship assets? And how do you currently nurture these relationships to create win-win situations?

Chances are that you already have lots of relationship assets.

The question is, how do you leverage those assets in a way that feels authentic to you?

Maybe the reason you haven’t nurtured these relationships enough is because you’re afraid you come over as pushy.

Or maybe it’s because there are simply too many small decisions to make and too little time in the day.

Here’s my suggestion.

Think about nurturing these relationships in a systematic way that feels completely authentic to you and people in your network.

Because when you combine the systematic side and the authentic side, you’ve got the key to making it effortless and effective.

If you want to chat more about this, I’m happy to connect on LinkedIn and start a conversation.

Have you ever seen what happens when gasoline goes bad? Spoiler alert: It's not good. In fact, if you don't have the right fuel in your tank, the consequences are disastrous. Just like car fuel, if you don't have the right company culture in place, you can find yourself broken-down on the side of the road. And overcoming a broken down anything--whether it be a car or company culture--is never easy.

So, do you have the right fuel in your tank? If you're broken down due to bad culture, or if you're merely looking to get better, this is a question you've got to answer--and often. Then once you have the answer, be prepared to take some difficult steps to get better. Because no matter how bad things may be, finding and using the right fuel is going to get you up and running toward your goals.

Below are six steps to improve your culture. The first three steps are specifically for the broken-down cultures. Just like you need a tow truck to bring your car to the shop, there are additional tasks required when your culture breaks down (But don't worry, fixing a culture doesn't involve sitting in the front seat of the tow truck and wondering what that smell is). Steps four, five and six are relevant to everyone, no matter how smoothly your engine is running.

1. Rebuild with best principles in mind, not just best practices. Believe it or not, an automobile can run on bad fuel. You can even put diesel fuel into a gas engine (or vice versa) and it'll work for a while. The problem is the car won't perform very well, and eventually it will break down. It's the same with bad culture.

So, filling your time with activities designed to build culture isn't necessarily helpful to you if those activities don't build the rightculture. For example, if you determine you're a company that cares a great deal about being friendly to the environment, going to a monster truck rally for a company party may not make sense. Even if the event is a rip-roaring blast.

When you rebuild a culture, you have to figure out exactly what kind of fuel you need before planning specific activities. This means focusing on principles, not practices. Take the time to identify your organization's DNA. Honestly evaluate who you are. Figure out what it is about your product or service that will inspire the type of employees you want (besides a paycheck), and write down your company values.

Once your values are in place, clearly and accurately define your mission and vision statements (a mission statement explains your reason for existing and a vision statement describes who you want to eventually become). Setting these principles in place establishes a firm foundation for the rest of your culture. Now, instead of a truck rally, you can go plant trees at a local park or make hammocks out of recycled six-pack rings.

2. Be humble and open. Rebuilding a culture is hard; there are no two ways about it. And it requires everyone to be better, beginning with leaders. When your company culture goes bad--just like when your car breaks down--it can be embarrassing. When it happens, leadership has to show genuine humility, acknowledging any shortcomings and being honest about the organization's failings. Otherwise, how can you learn from prior mistakes? A simple email or speech at a company meeting from the CEO might be all it takes, but it has to be sincere and heartfelt. And it must be followed up with consistent actions that prove they meant it.

From there, you must strive for better--more open--communication throughout the company. Culture should be discussed on a regular basis. Employee's opinions should be considered when making major culture changes, whether they come from performance reviews or surveys or conversation (or overheard chatter in the break room). In the end, everybody on the team should feel like they were part of the culture overhaul. It needs to feel like a team project. Not only will this ensure that everyone is on board, but everyone will know exactly what is expected of them.

3. Rip and replace. When fixing a broken culture, you can't always afford to spend your time tweaking failed strategies and initiatives. Sometimes you need to find the elements of your organization that aren't working, and simply eliminate them. Rip them out of the fabric of your company and replace them entirely.

For example, you might have a rewards program that your sales team has never been satisfied with. Instead of band-aiding the problem by throwing money at it, you might consider scrapping the whole thing altogether and starting from scratch. Dig deep and figure out what exactly motivates your team--not just financially, but psychologically as well.

Sometimes the thing that needs replaced is a member of your staff. Obviously, this is an especially hard thing to do. But if you've defined your mission, vision and values and still have staff members who refuse to comply to those critical building blocks of your organization, it's best for you (and frankly, for them as well) to let go and move on. Your team needs to be united, or past failures will continue to creep into the culture and ruin your best intentions.

4. Implement your values into regular activities. The values you define for your organization will mean nothing if you don't intertwine them into everyday work. Otherwise, your culture will evolve on its own, and whether it continues to match your values or not will be a tossup. Start by finding ways to incorporate your values into the following activities:

• One-on-ones - It will be a lot easier for managers to know how to manage their employees when they can use company values as a guide. For example, let's say an employee is having a hard time getting to work on time, and one of your values is "Be dependable." Rather than saying, "You're tardy and I'm sick of it," a manager can refer to the value and set goals with the employee to achieve it.
• Company meetings - By discussing company values with everyone, not only can you ensure the whole company is on the same page, but you can also stress to the whole team just how important your values are. This is also a good time to educate your people about your mission and vision. As soon as an employee loses sight of the why, the how and what will start to suffer too.
• Recruiting efforts - Most companies try to recruit for culture fits, but being a culture fit is more than just sharing similar personalities or interests with current employees ("Hey, I like Led Zeppelin, too!"). It's about sharing common values. By gauging candidates on their values, you'll be able to find the right people and, perhaps equally important, weed out those who would become thorns in the workplace.

5. Use the right technologies to jumpstart your efforts. You have a product or service that you provide, so sometimes it can be difficult to spend the amount of time you'd like to improve your culture. With the help of technology you can automate time-consuming tasks and free yourself to work on culture.

For example, there are onboarding automation tools that allow you to spend less time doing paperwork on first days andmore time initiating people into your culture. There are also performance management tools that are turningtraditional performance reviews on their heads, making them more useful in quickly identifying employees who are hurting the culture and giving direction on how to get them back on board.

6. Keep your eye on the fuel gauge.Remember that, just like a car, your culture will need constant fuel to thrive. Don't look at rebuilding (or building or improving) your culture like it's an ad hoc project--because it's not. Maintaining a great culture is an ongoing process that requires constant attention and care. You just have to always be honest with yourself and be prepared to make the necessary improvements, whether you're broken down on the side of the road, or merely looking to speed up the journey to your ultimate goal

China's largest bank is throwing its weight behind Singapore organisations and companies to join in the One Belt, One Road initiative.

A raft of agreements to increase Sino-Singapore cooperation was signed yesterday between the Singapore branch of the Industrial and Commercial Bank of China (ICBC) and five local parties.

One agreement was inked with the Singapore Business Federation (SBF), extending up to 50 billion yuan ($10.2 billion) in funding to SBF members for infrastructure investments under the initiative.

This brings total financing available for Singapore companies to at least $100 billion, including International Enterprise (IE) Singapore's deals with three Chinese banks that provide over $90 billion in funding.

The figure is significant, considering that the Asian Infrastructure Investment Bank (AIIB) has US$100 billion (S$136 billion) in capital, which could support lending of between US$200 billion and US$500 billion, according to a European Commission estimate.

• $10.2b

• Funding to Singapore Business Federation members for infrastructure investments under the initiative.

• $100b

• Minimum total financing available for Singapore firms at the moment.

Memorandums of understanding were also signed by Singapore Press Holdings, Singapore Exchange (SGX), Surbana Jurong and Sinochem International Corporation at an inaugural forum on financing for One Belt, One Road infrastructure projects yesterday.

Surbana Jurong chairman Liew Mun Leong said its agreement would allow the firm to offer its clients a full suite of financial and engineering expertise for urban infrastructure projects."Our expertise in urban planning, engineering, project management and facilities management services fully complement ICBC's financial-related services," said Mr Liew, who also chairs Changi Airport Group.

ICBC chairman Yi Huiman said the bank's Singapore branch has 20 Belt and Road projects in reserve that involve about US$3 billion of financing. It also has more than 200 projects in reserve globally, with a total investment of more than US$200 billion. "We will provide enterprises with 'one-stop' financial services including international settlement... that reflect Singapore's market characteristics and build on ICBC Group's resources," he said.

The bank, which organised the forum with Surbana Jurong, will also create a one-stop service system that includes information consulting and project matchmaking.

Mr Lim Hng Kiang, Singapore's Minister for Trade and Industry (Trade), noted that the Asean region will need an estimated US$60 billion annually until 2022 for infrastructure. He said Singapore and Chinese companies share complementary strengths and can work together in third-country markets.

Mr Lim cited the partnership of Singaporean engineering company ISDN with China Huadian Engineering, one ofChina's largest industrial players, to develop mini-hydropower projects across Indonesia. "I would like to encourage more of such fruitful partnerships between Singapore and China," he added.

In a separate panel on infrastructure financing, Mr Kow Juan Tiang, group director of environment and infrastructure solutions at IE Singapore, emphasised the "tremendous demand for infrastructure", countering the claim that policy banks like the AIIB are crowding out commercial banks. "Forget all the numbers, what is needed is one Singapore to be developed every week for the next five years... that's the magnitude we are talking about," he said.

Mr Kenneth Loo, president of the Singapore Contractors Association, said the Belt and Road initiative would provide a "good start" for local contractors to move into the region, but added that it would be challenging for individual Singaporean companies to get financing for such projects on their own.

Making the Most of the Gift - John Maxwell

Just about everyone has experienced being on a team where people had to take on roles that didn't suit them: an accountant forced to work with people all day, a basketball forward forced to play center, a guitarist filling in on keyboard, a teacher stuck doing paperwork, a spouse who hates the kitchen taking on the role of cook.

What happens to a team when members constantly play "out of position"? First, morale erodes because the team isn't playing up to its capability. Then people become resentful. The people working in an area of weakness resent that their best is untapped. And other people on the team who know that they could better fill a mismatched position on the team resent that their skills are being overlooked. Before long, people become unwilling to work as a team. When people aren't where they do things well, things don't turn out well.

The hot buzz now is creating your personal brand and standing out in the social world. Because our challenge is through the web, computer, and the written word, it requires a different approach than meeting in person.

Related: 3 Steps To Branding Yourself For Career Success

So, you are invited to a business party or event. You walk in and pretty much everyone is dressed in some form of black, blue, gray, brown, or beige. Then, your eyes catch someone wearing a royal blue, cherry red, banana yellow, and lavender something. Your eyes naturally go to that vivid color.

This concept is similar to how people communicate. Most people are standing a few feet from each other speaking to each other with the mouth moving but little else energy or emotion. One person you notice has a crowd around them and is using their hands, smiling, animated, having fun and engaging others to have fun and participate, too. Their energy is stimulating others energy.

We all have the potential to be this and do this.

Your Personal Brand, Personal Branding, Unique Selling Principle, and Brand Essence are really all the same name and description for who you already are. Our given genetic DNA personalities give us everything we need to tap into this.

Our “persona” is both internal and external. For some it comes easier than others.

Some of the things we can do to develop this internal and external persona is:

• Develop a professional appearance and image
• Develop a positive mindset and attitude
• Discover your communication style
• Nurture and manage relationships
• Mentor others
• Advocate and support others
• Volunteer and give back

I love this post from Seth Godin’s blog, Finding Your Brand Essence. It really resonated with me.

“Clothes don’t make the man, the man makes the man. Clothes (and the brand) just amplify that.”

How are you discovering and creating your internal and external persona?

“Anyone who waits for recognition is criminally naïve.” – Congresswoman Barbara Jordan

Years ago, I had an opportunity to speak for the women’s leadership program for a well-known Silicon Valley company. My session was on Personal Branding, in particular how the women in this male-dominated company and industry could be more pro-active about fulfilling their potential; earning the respect they want, need and deserve; and positioning themselves for pay raises, promotions, projects and positions.

I had an opportunity to interview one of their senior executives to get his input on what I could cover in my presentation to make it maximally timely, relevant and useful. He shared an insightful story about how some women sabotage themselves when it comes to maintaining the visibility necessary to be considered for career advancement.

He said, “Sam, I try to be a champion for women, but sometimes they don’t help themselves.”

I asked, “What’s an example?”

He said, “Last year, we opened an office in Paris. A woman in my department had lived in France as a foreign exchange student and speaks French fluently.  I thought she would be a real addition to our team there so I threw her hat in the ring when we were discussing possible staff selections. 

The other executives at the table just looked at me with puzzled expressions. No one knew who she was. I went to bat for her and tried to explain why I thought she could help us ramp up this new location.

One of my colleagues finally recognized her name. He said, “Okay, I know who you’re talking about now. She’s sat in on some of my meetings. But she never says anything.’

She ended up NOT getting that position, and it wasn’t because she didn’t deserve it or wouldn’t have done a good job. It was because those decision-makers hadn’t witnessed her adding value and weren’t willing to take a risk on someone they didn’t know.”

I asked, “Did you talk to her about this missed opportunity?”

“I did. And when I asked why she didn’t speak up in those meetings, she said, ‘I tried to, but everyone just talked over me.  I suggested a way to streamline some of our procedures, but no one listened. In fact, a few minutes later one of the men said pretty much the same thing and everyone went, ‘Great idea!’  I finally just gave up.’

I told her, ‘Don’t you realize, if you don’t say anything at meetings, you make no mark? The people there conclude you don’t have anything to contribute.”

I shared his input during my presentation and suggested several ways women could speak up at meetings so participants experience them adding value and have first-hand evidence of their LeadHership ability. Here are those six tips.

Six Ways to Add Value at Meetings so People Experience your LeadHership

1. Promise yourself you'll contribute at least one ACTION-oriented suggestion at every meeting. Notice, I did not say anopinion, I said an action.  Instead of simply sharing what you think or feel,contribute specific options of what can bedone to move a project forward, turn an idea into reality, or achieve a company objective.

2. Never point out what’s NOT working – unless you immediately follow up with how this can be replaced with something more efficient and effective.  In other words, instead of focusing on a problem and what’s wrong, focus on a solution and how this can be done right.

3. Do not defer compliments, graciously honor them.  If someone praises you, instead of saying, “It was nothing.” or “My team deserves the credit.” say “Thank you. Your feedback means a lot.” Then, add a detail, e.g., “Our goal was to exceed our sales quota this quarter, so we identified three high-profile clients, reached out to them, and we’re pleased to land three new major accounts.”  Then, talk about your nextgoal or upcoming initiative so people are aware of how you’re continuing to add value.

4. Keep your comments to two minutes or less. No one likes a windbag. Richard Branson said, “Time is the new money.” In today’s rush-rush, impatient world of INFObesity, time is the new TRUST. By keeping your remarks succinct, purposeful, pro-active and to the point, people will always want to hear what you say because you're always a good use of their time and mind.

5. If someone interrupts, speak up instead of suffering in silence as they talk over you. Look at the person, use his or her name, and say, “Mark, let me finish” or “Elizabeth, I want to hear what you have to say right after I wrap up my report,” or “Bev, one more minute and then it’s your turn." Then, be brief, but conclude your remarks. You're not being rude, just clear and confident that you have the right to speak.

6. SIT TALL.  If you slouch, tuck your chin in, or use a tentative, high-pitched voice, people will doubt your clout. Instead, roll your shoulders up and back and sit up straight. Think “Tower, don’t cower.” Speak with a warm, firm, lower-pitched voice of authority that projects so every single person can hear every single word.  

A program participant chased me down in the parking lot after that Silicon Valley talk to thank me. 

She said, “Sam, I was on the verge of quitting this company. I wasn’t getting credit for all my hard work and overtime, and I’d become really resentful. I’ve been putting out fires, saving the day, and no one seemed to notice or care. You helped me realize that I can’t blame my boss for not giving me the recognition I think I deserve if I'm not giving him evidence of all the ways I'm making a difference for our clients and company.”

Her feedback made my day because it reinforced the premise of my LeadHership program. It is idealistic and unrealistic to expect organizational decision-makers to know all the ways we’re contributing and to initiate on our behalf.  They’ve got enough on their plate without taking responsibility for our career advancement.

It’s up to us to, diplomatically, give organizational decision-makers evidence of how we’re contributing so they experience our LeadHership first-hand.  Only then will they be motivated to give us the promotions, positions, projects and pay raises we deserve. Only then will they know we're "up to the task" and can be trusted to add tangible, real-world value because they've personally experienced us doing just that.

The career ball is in your court. How will you be a LeadHer at your next meeting? 

Sam Horn, Founder/CEO of the Intrigue Agency, is the author of Tongue Fu!, What's Holding You Back? andWashington Post bestseller Got Your Attention? Her work has been featured inNew York Times, Forbes, INC, NPR and MSNBC. Want Sam to inspire your group? Contact Cheri@IntrigueAgency.com to discuss your goals and ask how Sam can contribute to the success of your professional women's group or event.

It was early one morning and I was on a press tour, just about to launch my now ​New York Times bestselling Book, ​SELF MADE: Becoming Empowered, Self Reliant and Rich in Every Way. My first scheduled appearance was on the Fox News morning show, ​Fox an​d Friends, because according to my publicist, “that’s a show that sells books.”

Anyone who knows me, knows that privately I am very opinionated; but it’s another thing altogether to step into the national press circuit, which then gets picked up on social media, and potentially have your words haunt you for a long time, particularly when you are not a political pundit.

I went on the show and spoke about my book, about the opportunities for women entrepreneurs, about a nonpartisan, private sector approach to growing the economy, and helping women achieve their self-reliance. Everything was going smoothly until I was suddenly asked the question about “illegal aliens.”

The term itself stung my ears, and I felt I had no choice but to correct the news anchors. “That’s not what they are called,” I said, with all the courage I could muster​—​“They are undocumented.”

My appearance on Fox News went viral. I received love mail and hate mail alike, and guess what? I lived. Not only did I survive the enormous backlash, but I also walked away feeling so empowered and proud for speaking my mind and standing up for undocumented Latinos. Thank God for a journalist like Jorge Ramos, who has spoken up loudly himself, and has helped me to become so much braver.

But the experience left me wondering why it seems we, as a culture, don’t speak up as much as we should and why we aren’t mobilizing peaceful demonstrations, just as we did in support of immigrant rights in 2006, in response to one particular candidate who continues to berate our community.  And while there are a few individuals in our community, other than political pundits, speaking up and against him, I strongly believe that it won’t be until we go beyond our $1.3 trillion purchasing power and actually VOTE we will ever be taken seriously.

Consider what I wrote in my book about this being the greatest time in history for Latinos financially, specifically for Latinas who are the number one emerging market and the number one purchasers in this country, and that our numbers and our birth rates are greater than every other group by a long shot.  So why, I ask, do we seem to lack real political clout?

We should be taking cues from the African American, Jewish and LGBT communities, all groups who continually fight for their rights, who speak up when they are maligned or mistreated.  Let’s defend ourselves and people in our community who can’t speak for themselves.  Let’s not let our silence get the better of us.  By not speaking up, we damage our power base and our ability to be part of the national narrative.

We Latinos need to come together and try to fully understand each other.  We share a common language but our individual communities are different and it often feels difficult to comprehend and relate to each other’s respective plight.  For example, Mexican and Central Americans are facing difficult immigration issues; Puerto Ricans are contending with the prospect of their country’s bankruptcy; Cuban Americans, not all, are disappointed that our nation is doing business with a communist and totalitarian regime; and ​most of us don’t understand what the future of Venezuela will be following Chavez’s death. With such markedly different circumstances, it’s no wonder we haven’t been able to find a common thread.  But there is a common thread: WE ARE ALL LATINOS.

As a Latina immigrant, I ​will speak up for other Latinos in my community, especially those who aren’t able to speak for themselves.  And I’ll do this because I want my son, Lukas, to see what a person should do for people from his same culture even though we may not all think the same or have the same ideology, even though we may not be from the same race or religion, even though we may not share the same sexual orientation and gender identity.  I want Lukas to understand that history has shown us when people don’t speak up and stand up for each other, the darkness that lies in our nature can cause atrocities to occur.  I will show my son that silence is the greatest perpetrator of hate.

Some of us may believe that we have nothing to do with those undocumented immigrants who many want to keep out by building a wall, but we don’t have to go very far back to remember that they are us and we are them. Smart minds can figure out what is right for this country and right for human beings, but as Latinos, we should be leading this conversation and not allowing others to determine that for us.

So I ask: is there something we can agree on, is there a common denominator that we can get behind that unites us and allows us to finally bring our potential power into the light, into action and into results that help us as a group?  I believe that voting is one way, are there others?

How can each one of us be braver, be louder?  How we can show our children that they are Latino, that their lives matter and we are willing to fight for their futures?

Who is going to pick up the baton and pass the torch of power and possibility to our children? The answer has to be: WE ARE. WE ALL ARE.

1. The Commander: this is the person who makes the final decisions. At work this may be your boss. In a negotiation, this is the person who needs to sign off on your side of the deal. If you are buying a car, this may be your significant other who you have to run the deal by to get final approval.

2. The Negotiator: this is the person who does most of the talking. The negotiator does not have the authority to make final decisions; however, he/she is the one who puts the deal together by talking with the other side. The relationship that the other side forms with the negotiator is the key to determining how the negotiations go.

3. The Scribe: this is the person who takes down notes throughout the negotiations. Negotiations can stretch on for hours/days/months. It can be very difficult to remember what was agreed to or what was said in the past hour or day or month. The scribe takes careful notes and makes sure that the negotiator can easily find the information that they need.

4. The Floater: Negotiations always require more information than is currently available. The floater is the person who gets things, checks things, and confirms things. The floaters’ activities are designed to allow the negotiator to focus on the negotiations without having to constantly go searching for additional material.

Needless to say, all too often we find ourselves playing all four roles. Just be aware that you are playing these separate roles and make sure that they other side knows this too. This way when the other side starts to pressure your negotiator role to agree to something, you can push back by saying “I need some time to think about this.” In this way you can buy your Commander role some time to make a good decision.

Do you know what makes an effective coaching relationship?

It’s not necessarily a good coach. Youneed to be coachable.

Being coachable is a surprisingly uncommon skill. The truth is that many people don’t want help changing – they want a coach to tell them they’re fine as they are, or to agree with their versions of why things are going wrong in their lives.

The problem with this attitude is that most of us have blind spots that are seriously holding us back when it comes to our lives and our careers. The role of a coach is to turn your attention to those spots, but if you won’t listen, you can’t overcome them.

How to know if you’re resisting being coached

Of course, one big blind spot many people have is about how coachable they are. You may think you’re the model coaching client or mentee – but are you?

Listen for these phrases next time someone gives you advice or criticism. (You may either speak them aloud, or hear them inside your own head).

• I already know all this
• That won’t make a difference
• He/she doesn’t understand what I’m trying to do
• That worked for him/her, but it won’t work for me
• I don’t need to listen to this

If any of these phrases pop into your head or out of your mouth, you’re not making yourself open to advice. Instead, next time you’re in a coaching situation, make the decision to have a truly open mind.

The biggest trait of coachable people: A growth mindset

In her book Mindset: The New Psychology of Success, Carol Dweck talks about the difference between people who have a “growth” mindset versus a “fixed” mindset.

The former, she writes, see their skills and abilities as something they can change and develop. The latter see them as a fixed trait.

For example, a student with a growth mindset believes she can become better at math by studying harder, whereas someone with a fixed mindset believes she is simply bad at math and stops trying.

Asking for help with math becomes difficult for the student with the fixed mindset, because she believes it reflects poorly on her personally to “not be good at math.” The student with the growth mindset, on the other hand, has little trouble asking for help. In her mind, a willingness to learn and grow is an asset, not an admission of failure.

When you approach coaching with a growth mindset, you’re removing pride from the equation. Instead of letting your ego be wrapped up in whether or not you know it all, you’ll make yourself be open to asking insightful questions, receiving honest feedback, and making positive changes.

Being coachable is a vulnerable, humble state. But choosing a growth mindset and receiving feedback without pride will help you grow by leaps and bounds.

Once upon a time, you nailed that interview. You put into practice all the tips you’ve read on the web on how to control your body language, how to answer all those sneaky interview questions, and you really felt as if you left a pretty good impression on your interviewer.

Related: 6 Traits Of Bad Bosses

You get the call after an eternity of sleepless nights and anxious walks with your phone glued to your hand. In the end, you do get the job and… bang! Only a month later, you realize your boss is a bad person. A real jerk, if you have to be honest.

Does this sound familiar?

The question is – how do you spot that jerk boss right on the spot, so that you save everyone’s time by acknowledging the fact that you wouldn’t fit in that company right during the interview?

Here are a few points to get you started with, when YOU assess your future boss during your next interview:

They are too nice with you.

Yes, you’ve read it – too nice. (Well, first of all – nice and boss don’t go that well together.) Jokes aside, during your first encounter with the manager, the connection should come naturally and authentically. Don’t get me wrong, there might be many bosses out there who would really be nice because that’s who they are.

In most cases, however, it either means they are hiding something under that perfectly polished body language (or their office desk) or they are too desperate to have you on board, as they are faced with fluctuation of labor in the company. In other words, beware if you hear phrases like, “We are flexible with the working hours, you might come and leave as you like, as long as the job is done!”

They don’t listen.

If you want to be a good communicator, then you should be able to listen – especially, if you are a leader. If you catch your future boss checking their laptop/computer/iPad too often, then it either means that you are doing a really bad job during that interview, or that he/she is a self-centered jerk. These types of managers also tend to forget asking if you have any particular questions about the position and the conditions in general, while they go on boasting about how successful their company is.

They take all the credit.

These managers would brag about how they magically revived the company after it had been almost destroyed by the previous owners, or how they went from 20 to 100 employees in just over a year, all because of THEM. You see, it is more than adorable that the company is growing like a sponge. As the company grows, you will, too – which is quite good news.

However, if you hear them say, “I had my first office in a garage and now look where I am now,” it means they most probably haven’t yet realized what one of their most crucial roles as an entrepreneur is – to value their subordinates and all the hard work they have done.

They bad mouth other job seekers like you, or even their own subordinates.

Saying things like, “You can’t even imagine the type of person I interviewed earlier today…” or “The Marketing Manager is going to have a lot to explain about the situation she put me in!” is, and should always remain, a bad sign!

A leader, who is meant to see the value in people, cannot analyze the behavior of others in front of a potential job candidate. Unless they are psychologists, they are not allowed to do that. This type of talk should alert you that, as talented and skillful you are, your manager might be talking about you next time.

Their office says it all: Signs are everywhere.

Some entrepreneurs are so good at their ‘social game,’ that you will never know who they really are and how they really treat their subordinates, until you pay attention to their office space. I think that the more lavish the office space is, the tougher the boss will be.

Pay attention to details in the interior, such as too many photos of your future boss shaking hands with important people (politicians, writers etc.), or too many statues of things you can’t even name, or strange figures with clocks hanging from them, or a desk wide enough to fit your bathroom. If you have the feeling you are in a palace, rather than an office, then chances are that this boss tends to do things their way.

Practice says it all: The déjà vu.

If you feel like you’ve gone back in time when stepping into the office and their attitude resembles an ex-boss, who you weren’t much fond of, then most probably you would be right in turning the offer down. I recently was at an interview, where the manager and the office space were so familiar to me that I was planning to run half-way through the interview. There is a small chance I might have been wrong but I decided I would pass, considering the fact that they even looked alike.

Don’t forget to take this list with you on your next interview, just in case you forget any of the points. And, do make sure your future boss doesn’t see it, or you won’t have to make a decision at all!

This post was originally published at an earlier date.